What I Do

Jeromy can build and network computers. That means he's often found helping friends and family members with their endless lists of computer woes. Likewise, he's an experienced electrician and handyman, so he's been known to fix plumbing, wiring and minor construction problems for many of our friends. What else? He has a chain saw, a table saw, an air compressor, two trailers and a house full of other tools he knows how to use. He's an expert mover/Uhaul packer, a certified mechanic, a natural leader, and he's usually in the process of learning at least one or two other trades to add to his skill set.

I'm not telling you this in an effort to market my husband's abilities. Instead, I'm stating it as a point of contrast to my lack of neighborly skills.

What can I do? Mix a good drink, outline a decent story plot, make a hearty pot of soup, daydream complete movie scripts, create handmade holiday cards, critique many genres of art. Not much in comparison to Jeromy's laundry list of practical skills. Even my training in business and technical communication means nothing to anyone I know.

I'm qualified to edit and reformat your resume, to write a winning business proposal for that startup you've always considered but never pursued, to interview and pen a glowing profile about you or anyone you know ... but these aren't the kinds of practical tasks that come up in dinner party conversation.

Instead, people know vaguely that I write for a large corporation. But they don't understand what I write, what that corporation does or why in God's name it would pay me to sit at home and pound away at my keyboard all day long.

So, instead of practical questions like: What do you know about wireless routers?  How do I install a ceiling fan? Or What's the best way to take up old tile? I get questions like: Can I read one of the books you've written? Can I suggest an article idea for your next writing assignment? Can you turn my wild past into a best-selling novel?

I wish I could answer yes to all of those questions, but the truth is - unless your past involves in-depth data analysis, your article is about a visionary CIO or your idea of a book is a corporate magazine, I'm left giving awkward explanations about what it is really that I do. And then, inevitably, your eyes go blank, you see someone else across the room you really wanted to talk to and you walk away thinking, "Well, that's not my idea of what a writer does. How boring."

But, you know, I mentioned I'm a daydreamer. And I do have other creative aspirations, so maybe next time I will say yes. Yes, tell me about that article idea and maybe I'll send a query letter out to your favorite magazine next month. Yes, tell me your best stories, and I'll work them into a screen play some day. Yes, I'll send you the Amazon link to my latest book (technically, there is an out-of-print anthology of short stories out there that credits me as the editor).

Why not? I could learn a lot, and it has to provoke better conversations than trying to explain data integration, statistical analysis and performance management to friends and acquaintances. 

Who wants to talk about all that? People want to talk about themselves, and I do love a good story. I'm not going to lie about what I do, but if you assume my writing life is one thing, why should I ruin the image - and the dinner party conversation - to correct the faulty assumption?

So - what's your wildest story? What was that article idea you wanted to share? What type of book would you like to see me edit next? E-mail your ideas today!

Comments

[running2ks]

"How to make scintillating dinner conversation when no one knows what you do for a living?"

Oh, I completely feel for you. I'd be happy to have you as a neighbor.

[Kelly]

OK missy....I am quite proud to have a friend who writes for a fancy corporation. I am very pleased to have a friend who throws the greatest parties where you KNOW you are family when you hit the door. I remember sitting at your kitchen table in Princeton one night when Meg was with her dad. I didn't know all of the people at your house, but I know I felt included and it felt perfect.

As for your writing -- just reading what you write here amazes me. You are very talented and I think you could write anything in the world you wanted. I'll talk statistics with you, as that was one of my favorite classes. Art is a different story, even though I do appreciate it. Right now I am into this little red head's art, Megan. It lines my fridge and my desk at work, and my dresser in my bedroom. I can talk all day long with you about the art of the second grader living under my roof.

I also know that I am proud to have a friend who is a sassy, hard working, cool mom just like me. :-)

[Alison]

Running2Ks: There's a house down the road for sale!

Kelly: Wow - that might be the best comment I've ever received ... and I wasn't even fishing for compliments!

Thank you both for brightening my morning.

[Stan]

Hey,

When is Jeremy going to fix my porch?

[jen]

What Corp are you talking about? I thought you wrote kids' books. Come to think of it I'm not sure what most of your family does -- now I'm thinking SPY. Robey's the best spy yet, he can get us grown-ups to do whatever he wants without us even knowing it. He must hold the Master Plan.

Lately I prefer silliness over business, nonsense over seriousness, craziness over professionalism; but I'd still be willing to talk statistics or business management. Just let me freshen up . . .

[Alison]

Penny Buckett, if I were a spy, I'd have busted you YEARS ago (wink, wink).

[Becky]

You know what? It's all relative. I don't know nothin' about wireless routers, but I could talk words & writing & stuff. Some mothers think eyes glaze over when they say they stay at home with the kids. Well, maybe they'd glaze over if they say they do such-and-such else. Some people are good at party conversation. Others are not.

That's why beer games are good.

[Erin]

I've started and erased this comment post three times now. Heard ya' loud and clear on this one.

[karen]

I would love a cool drinking game amongst friends!!

Ali- have you ever written grants? How about for a dying Catholic graded school that's been in Newport, VT for one hundred years? Who gives $$$$ to anything or one religious- esp for education?

My school is gasping for air.

[jen]

I would love to go to VT and drink. Haven't been there yet. What do the locals drink up there?

[karen]

Hey, jen. I have no idea!!! We never go out, we never get anytime off (we're organic dairy farmers). I usually get the urge to go out in the Springtime, and i love getting loopy. I know I can't drink anything w/peach in it because I got so, so sick in college on Schnapps- it was two yrs before I could tolerate smelling anything peachy, ugh {{{shudder}}}.

What do you cool people drink? I should know this, but aren't you in Maryland? I know you go to wine parties. I don't think I'd quite fit into that scene.

But, I'd try... just to be a sport :0)

[Alison]

Sorry, Karen - I don't have any grant-writing experience at all. It does sound like a worthwhile cause, but I wouldn't know where to start.

As for drinks, we run the gamut: beer, wine, spirits, etc. Jen makes a mean margarita. Her motto is, "Have 'ritas, will travel."

Our wine party was most definitely not a classy affair. We had a bon fire that night too, so you dairy farmers would have fit in well.

[jen]

Just started drinking Organic Milk and it is YUMMY! I try talking my husband into farming but he is Not For It, No How! He did move me into the country finally, so that is a plus.
Yeah, our wine party will include hogs next year! Hopefully we'll cut back on the puking. I mean "I" will cut back